In many ways, I am grateful to my mother, who allowed me to study at my high school. I transferred twice to another school because of conflicts with my teachers about my studies, but I still went back. It was the only place where I felt accepted and safe. In one of the schools I transferred to, I immediately had to face bullying about my appearance: I was just at the beginning of my puberty, I was small and fat. Subsequently, these humiliations, and the puberty in general, manifested themselves as depression and panic attacks.

Closer to senior classes, I gradually began coming out in my school. Everyone accepted me: both pupils and teachers' groups. I think that my experience is unique in a way because I’ve only heard stories about how a queer person hides their identity or sexual orientation at school for safety reasons. And I’m glad that my experience turned out to be exactly the way it is. I chose my school as one of the locations for the photoshoot because it’s nice to be back there.

In the family, we didn’t talk about sexuality at all. I looked for all the information on the Internet. Still, for a long time, I didn’t understand why memes and stories about being non-binary speak to me more than ones about the binary choices of transgender identity. Of course, I was lucky to have a good knowledge of English, so I had more resources to find information.

I live with my mother separately from my father; they are divorced. I have always had a close and trusting relationship with my mother. However, it was amazing just how surely she accepted me when I told her about my identity. She grew up in a conservative religious family, and I did not expect such openness from her. Sometimes she confuses pronouns when she addresses me, but it doesn’t hurt me. I see how she tries and supports me in everything else, and she has known me longer than I have known myself. Now I am the kind of person that I am, thanks to her. I love and appreciate her very much.

She is very energetic and friendly. I grew up in an atmosphere where guests often came home. My mother has been involved in sports all her life, she has many medals, and she often took me to competitions, so I visited many cities and countries as a child. It probably gave me a flair to find my circle of people and to feel enough freedom to express myself.

One of the days, I went up to my mom and asked her to give me a manicure. She agreed without further questions, I liked the experience, so I continued to do my nails.

A friend recommended me her nail artist, and I still go to see her. She treated me perfectly well, too, we communicate warmly and choose designs together. My mother often compliments my nail polish.

Now I understand that the trust between my mother and me is so valuable, she was the first person I ever asked about it.

I came out to my friends as soon as I realized that I am non-binary. Almost everyone accepted me. There were a couple of people who reacted in a judgmental manner, and this is where our communication stopped. I never had the feeling that I should be ashamed or hide any of my identities in society.

My relationship with my father was always strained. In my childhood, he was strict, and after the divorce, he became even more conservative. He began to actively support right-wing radical ideas and speak out against LGBT+ people. I rarely communicate with him, but when I meet him, I have to talk about myself in a masculine way, wear neutral clothes. Every time we had a conversation about LGBT rights, it ended in a conflict, so I try to avoid such topics with him.

Despite this, he has been involved in restoring my psychological health, looking for, and paying for doctors and psychotherapists. At first, I tried to contact the psycho-neurological care facility in my city. My complaints were written off because I was too young. I didn’t get any help. Of course, this did not help in any way to alleviate the suicidal thoughts that arose then. In this respect, I am grateful to my father for the fact that we always had money in our family, and I could use it to get qualified help.

My father’s relatives have influenced my passion for music. My uncle is a musician. He helped me choose an electric guitar when I wanted to learn to play. I would also like to connect my life partially with music. I have always loved to sing, and it would be nice to try playing in a band once.

So far, I have not had to deal with discrimination or violence, but I still do not feel safe enough in my city. From time to time, unwanted and aggressive attention is drawn to me, but I managed to avoid direct clashes.

From my experience at Pride events, I have seen that the police in my city should not be expected to provide protection or help either.

As for starting my family, I started thinking about it when I met my girlfriend. I hope that in the future we will be able to move and build a future somewhere abroad. I would not want children until I understand that I can provide them with a good and comfortable life. For now, I plan to try to develop my financial independence and career. If it was difficult for me to study during my school years, now I feel the strength and desire to invest in my education.